Lego’s Fantastic Instructions For Parents In 1973

If you care about inspiring children with an interest in engineering and aspirations not bound by their gender, this note may bring a tear to your eye. Two tears actually, both because it is so eloquently beautiful, and because it shows that in a lot of ways we have gone backwards over the last forty years.

Lego has been criticized recently for its move to gender its toys, creating “girl’s Lego” and producing, in the words of one seven year old, female characters that “sit at home, go to the beach, and shop,” while the boy characters “saved people, had jobs, even swam with sharks!”

To their credit Lego has taken this on board to some extent, with a line of women scientists, but the sad thing is that they needed to be pushed. Because there was a time when the Danish company got these things so, so right.

When reddit user fryd_  posted this image at imgur and said it came from a 1974 box of Lego, plenty of people disputed its authenticity.

However, io9 have weighed up the evidence and found it is more likely than not that this really was what Lego was telling parents back then.

Most convincingly, this is a pretty good translation of what the German version of Lego was telling parents.

The above ad from the same era went viral with people frustrated by the way Lego went backwards in this regard starting in the late 70s, a process traced by Anita Sarkeesian.

Still, given their recent responses to criticism, maybe Lego could think about releasing a retro line with the original instructions. There might be a few children of the 70s who’d quite like to buy it for their own kids.

via Lego’s Fantastic Instructions For Parents In 1973 | IFLScience.

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The Terrifying Origin Stories Behind Your Favourite Disney Movies

Good news, olde timey story fans: the first edition of the Brothers Grimms’ fairy tales will be finally translated into English, with the original endings restored. This is a huge deal, because most of these stories have been watered down to be more child-friendly over the years, with many of them eventually becoming Disney movies that were so different from the source material that you could hardly tell they were the same story.

Of course, Disney didn’t only change the endings to Grimm stories. Hans Christian Andersen, Victor Hugo, and more famous authors had their works posthumously edited by Disney to include a happy ending. So from Sleeping Beauty’s rape to Cinderella’s bloody revenge, let’s tackle the seven most horrifying Disney origin stories — it’s what the brothers would have wanted.

1. “Cinderella”

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How You Thought It Ended: In the 1950 Disney movie, Cinderella and her Prince were married, and lived happily ever after.
How It Really Ended: In the “Grimms’ Fairy Tales” version of the story, Aschenputtel and her prince also lived “HEA”… but her stepsisters met a bloody, horrifying end. The movie version of the sisters just kind of had to live with their jealousy and rage over Cinderella getting her prince, but the real story left them horribly disfigured. One of them cut her toes off to fit in the golden slipper, while the other sliced off her heel. 

But that’s not even the worst of it — during Aschenputtel and her prince’s wedding, doves flew down from Heaven and pecked the sisters’ eyes out. Rough.

2. “The Little Mermaid”

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How You Thought It Ended: Ariel was turned into a human permanently by her father, and lived happily ever after with her husband, Prince Eric. How nice.
How It Really Ended: Hans Christian Andersen played with some deeply spiritual themes in “The Little Mermaid” — for example, his Mermaid didn’t only wish for legs to get the boy, she wished for legs because Mermaids don’t get to go to heaven like humans do. Also, in this version of the tale, she felt like she was walking on sharp knives every time she took a step.

She also failed in her mission to get the prince to love her — if she succeeded, his kiss would breathe part of his soul into her body, allowing her to have an afterlife — and on the day of his wedding, she flung herself into the sea and died.

However, there was a somewhat happy ending in store, as instead of becoming sea foam she became a “daughter of the air” who could eventually earn her way to a soul if she did enough good things. Yeah.

3. “Snow White”

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How You Thought It Ended: The prince kisses Snow White, wakes her up, and carries her off to his castle. Also, the Evil Queen dies by falling off a cliff.
How It Really Ended: Same, but the Grimm brothers once again give the story’s villain a much crueler fate. The Queen was invited to Snow and her prince’s wedding, which was nice, but when she arrived she was given a pair of hot iron shoes and forced to dance to death in front of the wedding party.

4. “Sleeping Beauty”

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How You Thought It Ended: The prince defeats a dragon, kisses the sleeping maiden, then dances with her awakened self as her dress changes colors.
How It Really Ended: In Giambattista Basile’s 17th century tale “Sun, Moon, and Talia,” the prince didn’t kiss Talia when he found her sleeping — he was a king, and he raped her. She woke up months later with twin babies, Sun and Moon, then was reunited with the married king. She got her happily ever after, but only after the current queen tried to make the king eat his own babies. He threw her in a fire and married Talia as punishment.

5. “Pinocchio”

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How You Thought It Ended: Pinocchio saves Geppetto from the whale and is rewarded with human life by the Blue Fairy. Jiminy gets a job as a certified conscience.
How It Really Ended: Guys, the “real” Pinocchio, from Carlo Collodi’s story, was a dick. He murders the story’s version of Jiminy in the first act, and Geppetto goes to jail for negligence. Once he gets out, poor Geppetto sells his only coat to send Pinocchio to school and buy him a school book, which Pinocchio promptly sells for theater tickets. He gets worse and worse from there, so it’s hard to even feel that bad for him when Fox and Cat hang him from a tree, leaving him to suffocate to death.

6. “The Hunchback of Notre Dame”

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How You Thought It Ended: Quasimodo doesn’t exactly get a happily ever after with Esmerelda, but he does accept the fact that she does not love him like that. Also, he finally enters society after he defeats the villainous Frollo, and the people love him!
How It Really Ended: “Hunchback” was originally written by Victor Hugo — the same guy who wrote Les Misérables — so you knew it was going to end badly. Basically, Frollo hangs Esmerelda, Quasimodo kills Frollo, then Quasimodo mourns by Esmerelda’s discarded corpse and starves to death. 

7. “The Fox and the Hound”

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How You Thought It Ended: Tod gets to live out his life as a fox, Copper gets to live out his life as a hound, and they remember their years of friendship fondly.
How It Really Ended: Are you sitting down? Because in Daniel P. Mannix’s source material, Copper chases Tod until he dies of exhaustion. Then Copper’s master moves to a nursing home — but not before murdering Copper with a shotgun! Happily ever after, indeed.

via The Terrifying Origin Stories Behind Your Favorite Disney Movies – MTV.

Artist Removes One Letter from Famous Movie Titles and Illustrates the Results

Writer and illustrator Austin Light recently shared a funny series of sketches from his notebook that reimagines movie titles with one letter removed. The idea started on reddit where users were asked to, “Pick a movie, remove one letter, give a brief description“. As a daily art project, Light took the concept one step further, drawing a scene from the imaginary film. He also penned a brief synopsis for each. You can see the entire album on Imgur. For more from Austin, check him out at the links below.

AUSTIN LIGHT Website | Twitter | Online store

1. Obocop

The story of how a police officer works through his PTSD and adjusts to his new robotic implants with the help of the sexy soothing sound of his oboe

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Artwork by AUSTIN LIGHT Website | Twitter | Online store

2. Rave

One red-haired Scottish girl. One dance floor. One unforgettable night

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Artwork by AUSTIN LIGHT Website | Twitter | Online store

3. Men

A retired professor helps a rugged Canadian work through his aggression as he struggles to uncover his past. Patrick Stewart and Hugh Jackman star

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Artwork by AUSTIN LIGHT Website | Twitter | Online store

4. Finding Emo

An insufferable teenage fish runs away from home. His father contemplates searching for him

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Artwork by AUSTIN LIGHT Website | Twitter | Online store

5. Ron Man

A disgruntled government employee builds a robo suit in his garage to help him stop the government he works for from getting any more work done

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Artwork by AUSTIN LIGHT Website | Twitter | Online store

6. Jurassic Par

Two dinosaurs set out to prove they’re more than just killing machines. Thanks to a loophole in the rules they find a spot on the PGA tour and golf their way to the top of the food chain

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Artwork by AUSTIN LIGHT Website | Twitter | Online store

7. Harry Otter

A young boy finds out who, and what, he is. Magic ensues

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Artwork by AUSTIN LIGHT Website | Twitter | Online store

8. Pup Fiction

Two mob hit dogs go after a poodle who wrote a slanderous op-ed about their boss

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Artwork by AUSTIN LIGHT Website | Twitter | Online store

9. Pretty in Ink

The “gritty” 2014 remake of the 80s classic. It’s pretty much the same movie, just with more sick tattoos

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Artwork by AUSTIN LIGHT Website | Twitter | Online store

10. Fight Cub

When deforestation threatens his home, one feisty bear fights back

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Artwork by AUSTIN LIGHT Website | Twitter | Online store

11. Star Wars: A New Hoe

A farm boy, who apparently farms sand, fulfills his destiny and becomes the first farmer to do the kessel run in 12 parsecs

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Artwork by AUSTIN LIGHT Website | Twitter | Online store

12. Ad Max

In an apocalyptic desert wasteland only one man sells water, and he makes it look sexy as hell

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Artwork by AUSTIN LIGHT Website | Twitter | Online store

13. Beauty and the Beat

After a witch turns her best friend into a dope boom box, Belle decides to enter France’s Got Talent. She crushes it

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Artwork by AUSTIN LIGHT Website | Twitter | Online store

14. Scram

A thief with a penchant for masks keeps getting caught in the act

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Artwork by AUSTIN LIGHT Website | Twitter | Online store

15. Dive

Ryan Gosling plays a mysteriously appealing scuba diving guide who gets mixed up in some shady business. He has like 12 lines the whole movie. He also stomps a shark to death

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Artwork by AUSTIN LIGHT Website | Twitter | Online store

16. Mr. and Mrs. Sith

Mr. and Mrs. Sith Two Jedi abandon the order for love. Also to shoot lightning from their hands. Because that’s cool

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Artwork by AUSTIN LIGHT Website | Twitter | Online store

17. Oh Bother, Where Art Thou?

Convicted felon, Winnie, breaks out of jail with the help of his prison mates Tigger and Piglet, and set off on a cross-state journey to find his missing honey pot

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Artwork by AUSTIN LIGHT Website | Twitter | Online store

18. Man on Fir

The pacific northwest version of Tarzan

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Artwork by AUSTIN LIGHT Website | Twitter | Online store

19. Lord of the Rigs

The story of one man’s unhealthy obsession with his truck

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Artwork by AUSTIN LIGHT Website | Twitter | Online store

20. Aging Bull

A bovine pugilist comes out of retirement for one last fight. He loses

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Artwork by AUSTIN LIGHT Website | Twitter | Online store

21. The Fat and the Furious

After a bunch of thugs steal his sweet car, Jerry spirals into a vicious rage eating depression. He gets super ripped for the sequel though

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Artwork by AUSTIN LIGHT Website | Twitter | Online store

22. T.

A boy finds a jewelry clad alien who speaks exclusively in aggressive yet well-meaning catchphrases

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Artwork by AUSTIN LIGHT Website | Twitter | Online store

23. The Princess Ride

After years apart two lovers are reunited, only to discover neither loves what the other has become. Produced by Adam Sandler

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Artwork by AUSTIN LIGHT Website | Twitter | Online store

via Artist Removes One Letter from Famous Movie Titles and Illustrates the Results «TwistedSifter.